Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Floor bacon is actually really good
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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