Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
another moral hangover. fuck.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
