im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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