He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
okay pat passed out under dana's car
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
