Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize