there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize