Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Damn victory sex feels great
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
