Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."

(716): View more from New York

lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.

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(443): View more from Maryland

shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy

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(863): View more from Florida

In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.

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(916): View more from California

That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.

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(805): View more from California

I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.

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(216): View more from Ohio

Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.

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(951): View more from California

Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening

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