you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
