and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
