i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
We're too hungover to prance.
I need to align my fucking chakras
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
