it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
