And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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