if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
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you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.