I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
