You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
