Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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