i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
