Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
the day after is always just damage control
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
