Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
