plz talk dirty to me
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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