She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
