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I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
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