i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Randomize
