Please, let me fuck your mom
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
