idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize