You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
