should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
