fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
