I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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