I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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