I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
