Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
