yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Randomize
