3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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