YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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