...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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