i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
