is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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