Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Sheโs leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn Iโm a good big sister.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip ๐๐๐
Your skills amaze me
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4โฆ
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize