Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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