What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize