Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize