i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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