That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
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