pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
