Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We got so high we made milksteak
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
