i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
