Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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