I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
